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Colossians 4:6
6Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.
Always means always. It doesn't matter if we are talking to our spouse, our children, or someone antagonistic toward our beliefs, our speech should be gracious. It is even more important to speak with grace when the other person is raising their voice and being rude. A soft answer turns away wrath (Proverbs 15:1). If we are recipients of the abundant grace of God, it is our responsibility to pass that grace on to others in the way that we speak to them.
Salt is a preservative and adds flavor to foods. To season our speech with salt would be to let the Holy Spirit direct our words. Let our words be truthful and lasting. That means we probably need to pause before we speak. Remember that even Jesus paused and wrote on the ground before answering His adversaries (John 8:6). Our answer should be something that will touch the heart and remain on the mind. It is never about defending ourselves, but rather about graciously directing others to truth.
Jesus sometimes answered questions by referring people to Scripture (Matthew 21:16). Other times He answered a question with a question that caused his adversaries to consider their motivations (Matthew 22:17). By studying Jesus' answers we can see the best example of how we can answer graciously, "seasoned with salt."
Suggestion: Do a study on the way Jesus answered questions in one of the Gospels; then practice applying what you learned.